


PAPER HEARTS

by mizz_apple



Category: Monsta X (Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Crossing Timelines, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Romance, Sick Yoongi, Songfic, perfect!Shownu, slight of ShowHyuk, troubled!guy kihyun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-01
Updated: 2016-10-08
Packaged: 2018-08-18 22:25:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8178365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mizz_apple/pseuds/mizz_apple
Summary: Pictures I'm living through for nowTrying to remember all the good timesOur life was cutting through so loudMemories are playing in my dull mind .... ~~~ Paper Hearts ~~~





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> 2nd attempt to post my work from other fan site. Mind the grammatical errors/ typos / etc  
> Get Showki-ed  
> They're beautiful ..........  
> / sigh /

It was never hard to fall in love with an imaginary person. You could perfectly created every single aspect you wish someone could have and you'll fall in love forever and get old together. 

That's when it gets too hard when you're back on reality ... 

Yoo Kihyun was watching in agony when his crush stood there, holding an umbrella, together with another person. Smiling and laughing under the rain. He was drenched from head to toe but his heart was drier than Sahara desert. He bowed his head down to smile bitterly. Yes, he was a troubled boy. He found solace in cigarette, booze and harsh words. People hated him for being what society called "bad boy". He skipped classes, hung out with wrong crowds, trespassing, drank alcohol and smoking. He was called heartless because he cared nothing. 

But if Yoo Kihyun could point a good thing in his life, it was Son Hyunwoo.

 

Son Hyunwoo, he didn't know Kihyun so well. He only heard his reputation in the campus where people pointed at him as a "bad seed" . He always looked so savage and vicious with his ripped jeans and piercings in his ears. Yet he always also looked "beautiful". Hyunwoo didn't put much care on him since they majored in different fields. Hyunwoo was busy on his own life. He chose to befriend with people with similar interests with him. He never had thought that rebellion, violence or wild life suited him as what people at his age chose to do. He loathed those kind of acts and chose to stay away from people who lived through those lifestyles. 

But if Son Hyunwoo could say a turning point in his life, it was Yoo Kihyun.

 

For him, there wasn't a feeling close to peaceful than a blaring sound of hip hop, cigarette and alcohol. He could just sit and enjoy the day while his strereo played non-stop hip hop music. When he got too deep in his thought, he would grab his pen and paper and start to write lyrics he replayed in his mind over and over again and started to make a pile of papers in his trash bin. The only thing when he stopped was when his friend came knocking his door and grinned, bringing food and alcohol. He always looked at his friend and felt a pang of guilt crept through his heart, knowing that because of him, his friend couldn't have a better life. 

If Min Yoongi could point the best thing in his life, it was Yoo Kihyun. 

 

###################################### @@@@@ ################################### 

 

Yoongi watched as Kihyun smoked and laid in his couch. Sometimes he saw Kihyun's hands only played the cigarette with no intention to smoke it. He knew something was up in his mind. He scooted closer and hit his friend's thigh.

"You ok?" Yoongi asked with a squinting eyes.

Kihyun opened his eyes, disturbed. He grunted and turned his back. 

Yoongi smiled and playfully patted Kihyun's butt. 

"Stop!" Kihyun grunted, still no intention to turn around.

"Make me!" Yoongi patted more harshly.

Kihyun turned his body and started to kick his friend who replied it with big laughter. "Bastard." Kihyun muttered in irritated expression. 

Yoongi knew that Kihyun didn't mean it with his word. It was only their own language as a close friend. He knew Kihyun accidentally when he was creating graffiti around an abandoned building around Kihyun's campus. Kihyun approached him and said that his "art" was super and that moment left a good impression his heart. Yoongi was a rebel. Everyone knew that. He was born in rich but broken family. His mother lived separately with his father and Yoongi was left with his mother who had no intention to raise him better. He was left weeks sometimes months when his mother was busy looking for his father's replacement. She was never alone and flew country to country only to visit her lovers. Sometimes in Vienna, sometimes in Japan, other times in France and many times in Italy. While his father had settled down with a new wife and a daughter in Singapore. His father's life seemed balance and steady compared to his mother's. Yoongi felt pitiful for his mom but he also hated her for neglecting him since he was a teenager, only to find pleasures in her lovers' arms.

Yoongi knew Kihyun's story too of how he felt rejected in his family for being born as boy when his mother and father wanted a daughter so much. He had three brothers who didn't really pay attention to him and were busy managing their lives. Right until his sister came to the earth. His parents seemed to realize how hurtful his son was. But it was too late. His son rejected their affection and tried to runaway in his own world where he could create his own rules and build his own image of who he is. 

Yoongi also knew how fragile Kihyun was. How gentle actually his heart was. As if it made of paper ... just like his.

"What are you thinking about?" Yoongi asked. Despite his fierce looks, he was a caring friend inside.

Kihyun sighed. He looked into Yoongi eyes in confusion. 

"Yoongi, have you ... mm ... never mind." Kihyun suddenly stopped and rubbed his eyes tiredly.

"Hm?" Yoongi furrowed his eyebrows. Kihyun looked jittery and anxious. He wasn't like this usually. "Yoo Kihyun, what is going on actually?"

Kihyun stared at him. He sighed deeply before saying, "I think .. that I .. like man .." He shut his eyes, feeling embarassed. But he knew Yoongi would never reject him as his friend. He could be himself in front of Yoongi without feeling judged or ashamed. Yoongi understood him. As he understood Yoongi.

s

Yoongi opened his mouth, about to say something but finally closed it again. Kihyun peeked at him from his left eye. "C'mon. Say something."

Yoongi shrugged and replied, "How do you know?"

Kihyun shrugged back. "I just knew. I like girls. A lot. But ... " Kihyun stopped his words, his mind seemed to think about something.

Yoongi could feel his brain ticking. "You like someone? A man?"

Kihyun blushed. He hissed in Yoongi's words to cover his shame. " What?! No .. mm, no, it shouldn't! It's .. stop smirking!" Kihyun hit Yoongi's arm.

"You did! Yah, Yoo Kihyun, you just realized? No wonder you always peeked me whenever I took a bath!" Yoongi laughed when he felt Kihyun hit him incessantly.

"When did I ever peek you? Pervert bastard!" Kihyun furiously keep hitting Yoongi with seat cushion. 

Yoongi just laughed. He raised his hand. "Alright. So you didn't. It made me relieved. Although I kinda feel offended that you don't find me attractive enough as a man.."

Kihyun hissed. "Shut your mouth before I shove this cushion in it. And you were never attractive to me, Min Yoongi. You note that!"

Yoongi laughed harder. He took a seat beside his friend now. "Ok. Now tell me. Who is this poor guy?"

 

################################## @@@@@@@@ ################################ 

 

Hyunwoo yawned with his mouth stretched so wide. He stared at his books lazily. His brain tried to focus but eventually he gave up. He stretched his limbs and glanced around. Where is that kid, he thought.

From a far, Lee Minhyuk brought two hot cups of Americano and caramel frappe carefully to where Hyunwoo stood now. He smiled widely seeing his senior's back. Seeing him waiting for him brought a butterfly feeling in his stomach. He had this crush on his senior. His senior, Son Hyunwoo, was a charming yet friendly and humble prince of the campus. Girls loved to ask his help because he could never say no to help others. Some guys looked up to him, some drooled over him. One of them is himself. Yet, he was one of lucky person who could spend times with his senior and hung out together. 

"Hyung! Here. " he shouted from behind. 

Hyunwoo turned his body and smiled looking at him. "Where you've been?"

Minhyuk smiled brightly with his happy smile. Friends in campus gave him nickname as Sunflower because he has a bright smile that could bring others to smile. "I bought you this, hyung. I saw you almost fell asleep reading that notes." He gave Americano to Hyunwoo, who received it with a wide smile.

"Wow, Lee Minhyuk, you really are my junior! Thanks for this. How do you even know I need it so much?" Hyunwoo murmured to himself while sipping the Americano and stared back at his notebook.

Minhyuk only watched him and smiled. Of course I know, you silly ... 

They spent two hours doing their own tasks. Once in a while they engaged in conversation. When they weren't talking, Minhyuk secretly took a glance to Hyunwoo. There's something he wanted to do since long time ago. But he still had no courage to do that. He didn't know how long he could endure the feeling... 

 

Hyunwoo was focused in his reading. Minhyuk was still taking notes and humming. He liked being around his junior that was super funny and cheerful like he was. He was obnoxious sometimes but still cute. Hyunwoo thought about his little brother at home whenever he saw Minhyuk. Only he never thought that Minhyuk could be his brother. Truthfully, if Minhyuk was a girl, he would date him for sure. He was a pretty and handsome boy. Just when Hyunwoo was thinking about asking Minhyuk to accompany him to watch new movie, he saw Kihyun from afar. And suddenly his mind was unfocused ...

He didn't know when exactly. Was it the day he saw him lying helplessly in the alley or maybe the day when he accidentally saw Kihyun was staring over sunset in their unoccupied third-level building in his campus. Hyunwoo wanted to explore campus building and decided to explore that unfinished building, taking some pictures from different angle and that's how he saw Kihyun. 

Inhaling deeply, with his glowing chestnut hair as if the sun gave its last light only to shine on his hair and his body, creating a long shadow, Hyunwoo didn't understand why he stood in place like there's no tomorrow. He remembered, he raised his camera and started to take pictures of him from behind. His medium height with thin frame was clothed in black. He rarely saw Kihyun in another colors. He always wore black outfits. Sometimes white, sometimes grey, but mostly black. But being clothed in black actually spoiled his mysterious aura. He looked vicious but also delicate with his white milky skin and red lips. He wanted to say to Kihyun that wearing black only made him looked more fragile and beautiful, not intimidating or whatever reason he wore black...

Hyunwoo secretly took his picture with a careful manner, with no intention to disturb this beauty from his contemplating state. How careful his manner was, when there was only stillness and emptiness around, another people's presence slowly made Kihyun back to his world. He turned his body and found Hyunwoo looking at him through his camera.

Kihyun blinked his eyes. He thought he saw imagination but as the vision in front of him didn't fade away, he realized it was a person. It was Son Hyunwoo, his senior. 

For almost 5 minutes, they had a staring contest with a disturbed sigh came from Kihyun's curvy lips. He started to move away. But when he walked past Hyunwoo, Hyunwoo grabbed his wrist, "Don't go. I'm sorry. I am the one who should leave. You're here first, so I'll just go." Hyunwoo muttered his apology.

Kihyun just stared at him. He actually didn't know what to do. He felt awkward with another people's presence. He didn't usually get any apology. So he was only staring at Hyunwoo.

Yes, he knew Hyunwoo. Being one of the most popular guy in the campus because he won some of swimming competitions on behalf of their campus made him quite popular in the campus. He was a normal and good kind of guy who got good grades and had good friends also. Girls loved to be around him and guys treated him nicely since he was cool and charismatic in their eyes. 

To Kihyun, he saw him once outside their campus. Kihyun was walking down a lonely street of Seoul in the middle of the night when suddenly some thugs came over him and tried to gang up against him, to the point of almost being raped. Suddenly he felt, one by one, his attackers left. When he was collecting his breath, a pair of strong hands held his shoulders. He whimpered unconsciously. Truthfully, despite his haughty and fierce exterior, he was scared to death. He always tried to fight back to anyone who wanted to look for trouble with him and he was a good fighter. But one guy versus five guys was unequal. He was subdued in no time.

Kihyun, with his good reflexes, grabbed back the arms. He hadn't seen his savior yet but when he could see, he saw Hyunwoo was speaking to him in comforting tone. He helped him to stand and looked away when Kihyun hastily fix his ripped T-shirt and pulled up his jeans that showed his milky skin beneath it. His wrist, arms and ribs were bruised badly. He knew he would spend his sleep in agony but then his mind was cut when Hyunwoo turned his body and saw him in his fragile state. He remembered what Hyunwoo said, "Let's get out of here, found medicine for your wounds and some meal. It was a long night." Usually Kihyun would reject if anyone try to approach him or tried to make human contact to him. But his words were pure and broke his icy heart. He let himself being dragged to nearest clinic and got treated. After paying the bill which was rejected harshly but then Kihyun relented after Hyunwoo simply gave him deep stare, Hyunwoo then walked with him the entire night. Eating and taking him back to his apartment. 

Now, as he was staring at Hyunwoo, he felt his heart was going to explode. He wanted to runaway from this man who's giving him heart attack now but his feet seemed to freeze in place. Especially when Hyunwoo held his wrist, firmly and gently. He felt his cheeks got hotter and he couldn't properly breathe. Especially looking at those lips. Those red and plump lips of Hyunwoo. He imagined it after they bumped into each other after "the alley incident" . They didn't talk about it and lived their lives as usual. But Hyunwoo's soft lips always in his mind after that day when he said good night after taking Kihyun back to his apartment. It's such an embarrassing to say but Kihyun kept remembering those plump lips. He wondered how it tasted. Kihyun cursed his mind but still couldn't stop it. He wanted to know how did it taste. 

Maybe he was a reckless man. Kihyun always was. His life was a reckless one. 

He never knew how he got that courage. A rush decision was made and he reached up Hyunwoo's face, a little bit too rough, yet he didn't care. His mind was already made up. 

That kiss was rush and rough and lips met with lips. It wasn't pleasant but painful. As painful as Hyunwoo pulled himself away and pushed Kihyun back roughly. He stared in dark expression and said in low voice, "Get you hands away from me, you fucking bastard! I'm not gay!" He spat in front of Kihyun and left angrily, leaving a heartbroken Kihyun who watched him leave. He turned his body and looked to the sky that was getting dark.

He remembered crying softly that day ... 

 

Hyunwoo watched Kihyun quickened his pace when saw the man. Without further thinking, Hyunwoo ran towards him. He didn't know why. Maybe it was his guilt. Or his conscience told him to chase Kihyun. Or simply his heart wouldn't hear his brain but what he knew was that he was chasing Kihyun and left Mihyuk who was watching him in deep shock now. Hyunwoo didn't care much. He felt people stared at him in funny way and he quickened his pace when he saw Kihyun turned left and disappeared. He cursed silently and lost in his mind. He was standing in three ways with buildings and stairs surrounded him. He turned and saw all around him. And somehow, he saw those shoes, flinched a bit in the corner of a wall. Hyunwoo smiled triumphantly. He walked closer and said to whoever behind the wall, " I saw your shoes."

That person cursed softly. Hyunwoo held his laugh and watched as the person slowly and reluctantly showed himself. 

Kihyun felt his face reddened. He incessantly cursed to himself inside and didn't dare to look to Hyunwoo now. He was about to leave when Hyunwoo grabbed his wrist. Again, just like that day, firmly and gently... 

"Where are you going to?" Hyunwoo asked him in flat tone.

Kihyun frowned. Why do you even bother to know? He said to himself. 

Instead of answering, Kihyun wriggled his hand to break free. But Hyunwoo gripped it tighter. There was no way he could win against those muscles. Kihyun looked at him disapprovingly. "Let go!" He grunted.

Hyunwoo was examining his face. He never knew how lovely Kihyun's face when he was tense. With the way his jaw tensed and squinted eyes and pursed lips, he was far from intimidating for Hyunwoo. It was ... enchanting. Hyunwoo shuddered with his own thought. He unconsciously let Kihyun's hand free and grabbed it again when Kihyun turned to go. 

"What do you want?? Let me go!" Kihyun yelled, feeling irritated. He yanked his hand but to no avail since Hyunwoo's strength was beyond his strength.

"Two weeks ago you kissed me once without explaining anything and now what I did only grab your hand, you demand explanation from me? Isn't that unfair?" Hyunwoo snorted, tried to hide his amused tone.

Kihyun glared. But couldn't say anything. 

After making Kihyun silent, Hyunwoo pulled him closer and now held both of his arms tightly to make sure Kihyun didn't run anywhere. As he stared, he slowly held Kihyun's face with his both hands. He looked deep into Kihyun's eyes first then at Kihyun's moles in his forehead and down to his pointy nose and down again in his curvy thin lips with another mole in the upper corner and down again in his chin. He dragged his stare back to Kihyun's jawline which tensed (and miraculously Kihyun didn't even say anything during his sudden "inspection" ), up to his prominent rosy lips which parted a bit as if he wanted to say something but decided to stop. Hyunwoo felt his heart beating faster now and his mind was dizzy. He wanted to say something but failed. He kept staring at those beautiful lips that once touched his in that rooftop two weeks ago. He gulped down his saliva slowly. His mind kept telling him not to do something that he would regret but his heart told him to do otherwise. He wanted to make something that he would regret, something risky , something reckless ... 

That was the last thought he had when he pulled Kihyun closer and pressed his lips against Kihyun's deeply .....

 

~~~ TBC ~~


	2. Paper Hearts (2)

I hate this paper hearts  
And I'll hold a piece of yours  
Don't think I would just forget about it  
Hoping that you won't forget about it  
~~~~~ Paper Hearts ~~~~~

 

His mind kept telling him not to do something that he would regret but his heart told him to do otherwise. He wanted to make something that he would regret, something risky , something reckless ...  
That was the last thought he had when he pulled Kihyun closer and pressed his lips against Kihyun's deeply .....  
***  
Kihyun had ever kissed or been kissed by man before ...  
It was an usual Saturday night when he and Yoongi drank too much liquor and the alcohol level was too high in his bloodstream made him unable to think normally. When suddenly Yoongi pulled him to his side and started to kiss him. In confusion and out of curiosity, Kihyun kissed him back. They shared a long and deep bizarre kiss because it was mixture of alcohol, confusion, anger, sadness, curiosity, and a little lust. Kihyun remembered how swollen and red his lips became and how after a deep and long kiss, they both passed out in Yoongi's bed, holding each other.  
They woke up and hadn't say anything in a week. And that moment became a past and forgotten ...  
But here, at this very moment, Kihyun felt something different.  
He tried to pull back but Hyunwoo deepened the kiss by gripping his hip by his left hand and placing his right hand in the back of Kihyun's head. Kihyun couldn't move anywhere nor pulled back. So Kihyun just closed his eyes and began to melt in the kiss ...  
Hyunwoo's kiss was different than any other kisses he had tasted. It was more sweet and addicting than Yoongi's kiss or any girl he ever kissed. Kihyun couldn't figure out the difference. Was it the plump lips he always dreamt of, or the masculine scent of Hyunwoo, or because now Kihyun could vaguely felt Hyunwoo's heartbeat against his. He opened his mouth slightly, trying to feel Hyunwoo more, inviting him to taste himself ...  
Hyunwoo tasted so masculine. It was tempting, beastly and brutally sweet. Kihyun felt like being drunk in Hyunwoo's lips.  
Kihyun's kiss tasted different, that's what Hyunwoo thought. He could feel Kihyun's struggle at first but it faded away now, replaced with a hesitant yet inviting kiss. Hyunwoo had kissed girls before but this kiss was unexpectedly, different. Hyunwoo once thought it would be such a gross and disgusted feeling to kiss or be kissed by a man. But here, now, he was kissing Kihyun softly yet passionately. His lips, his lips. Hyunwoo stopped for a while to look at those mole in the upper corner of Kihyun's lips only to crush his lips again with Kihyun's lips which opened now with same eagerness as he was ...  
It was inviting ... It was too sweet like a nectar ... It was addictive and confusing ... It was majestic. Hyunwoo felt like being drunk in Kihyun's lips ...  
They pulled out in desperation of air. Face flushed and warm. For a moment, they tried to catch their breath and stared at each other in confusion. At this moment, Kihyun couldn't say anything at all. He breathed heavily with a weird feeling inside his stomach.  
Hyunwoo looked into Kihyun's eyes and while his hands still holding Kihyun's head, he leaned closer and whispered, " This .. is how you suppose to kiss someone ..."  
Kihyun's face reddened again. If it was possible. His mind suddenly replayed that day when he recklessly kissed Hyunwoo. Or tried to kiss him. Kihyun suddenly was feeling irritated. He pulled back and pushed Hyunwoo a little.  
"Satisfied? Can I go now?" he asked in flat tone.  
Hyunwoo looked at him with no expression. He furrowed his brow and laughed while shaking his head. "Yoo Kihyun .. really .."  
Kihyun felt a jolt in his heart hearing Hyunwoo called his name. But he was mad now and embarrassed and confused. He wanted just to go away so he turned his body.  
"Kihyun," Hyunwoo grabbed his wrist again and pulled him one more time into his arms.  
Hyunwoo arms embraced him tightly, leaving no place to run. Not even breathe. Kihyun wanted to curse this man who made his heart miserably beating out of rhyme. He could feel Hyunwoo tightened his embrace. "Hyunwoo hyung..." Kihyun whimpered.  
Hyunwoo placed his head in Kihyun's soft chestnut hair and inhaled it deeply. The scent of Kihyun's hair was a mixture of mint and cigarette. Same like Kihyun's kiss, it was minty and cigarette taste. Hyunwoo noted to himself that he would definitely remember those smell differently starting from now. Everything was different now in Hyunwoo's perspective as he held this small and thin figure with a minty and cigarette smell ...  
Hyunwoo loosened his embrace but still holding Kihyun in place. He stared into Kihyun who was staring at him back in mixed expression. He couldn't say what expression that was, he didn't really care. He held Kihyun's face right now, stroked it lightly, inhaled deeply and said, "For what I did two weeks ago , it was mean and coward. Forgive me."  
Kihyun's breath hitched and tears rolled down from his eyes ... Sometimes he hated his heart, as weak and as fragile as paper ... His paper heart ,,,

######################################### @@@@@ ######################################## 

Yoongi played a song that he just composed with his guitar. He replayed the lyric again and changed when he felt it was out of rhyme. He picked his wooden guitar and played it wholeheartedly as if he wanted to send the melody to the wind.  
At times like this, he would just look outside his window, gazed upon the stars and the sky. His dull mind played his childhood memory like a film without a sound. And his heart would break in pieces knowing that it was still a beautiful memory although ten years had passed ...  
Yoongi sighed. He was waiting for Kihyun today but he said he couldn't come. He had class. Yoo Kihyun had class. It was such an unbelieving fact. Yoongi knew that someone had stolen Kihyun away from him...  
It's not like he owned Kihyun. Maybe he was too weak, too clingy so he felt desperate when Kihyun wasn't around. He didn't get used to. He always had Kihyun by his side.  
Maybe it was a pathetic excuse ..  
Maybe he tried so hard to deny ...  
Maybe he really did fall in love with Yoo Kihyun, his best friend ...  
Yoongi reached his phone. He was looking at it in uncertain feeling. He opened picture by picture and suddenly his calm state broke into sobs. He cried out his heart that night ....  
****  
Kihyun didn't understand what state he was with Hyunwoo. One day they met and kissed like there's no tomorrow. The other day they would avoid each other's eyes.  
Like today. He was yawning after the class, and yes, he even couldn't believe he wanted to come to class these days, walked aimlessly around campus where he saw Hyunwoo and a silver-hair guy walked and laughed together. He knew Hyunwoo got few friends and many fans in the campus. Yet he always saw this man hung around with Hyunwoo a lot.  
He felt a fire burnt in his chest. He gritted his teeth when he saw how touchy that man with Hyunwoo and how friendly Hyunwoo towards him.  
He followed their movements with a deep and angry gaze and maybe Hyunwoo sensed it. His eyes accidentally met with Kihyun's eyes and his smile faded away.  
Kihyun snorted and walked furiously to campus entrance gate. He hated this weird feeling that he had towards Hyunwoo. He didn't understand why he felt like someone that he is not in latter's arm, or had this crazy tingly feeling inside his stomach every time he saw Hyunwoo's eyes or just his back view. Kihyun really had no clue as to what happened to him lately. His mind seemed to be somewhere else and he felt miserable and desperate.  
Kihyun didn't like being in this ... fragile situation ... He was usually strong and independence .. Never need anyone's presence to make him happy.  
Now that he met Hyunwoo, who inconsiderately had turned his heart upside down, he felt like he was not being independence anymore. He felt weak, imprisoned and locked in Hyunwoo's magnetic presence ...  
***  
Kihyun was talking casually with Yoongi in a cafe near the campus when he saw a pair of man came inside the same cafe. He saw that Hyunwoo was with that silver hair man again. And this time, that man was dragging himself with his hands clung onto Hyunwoo's thick arm. He was laughing so brightly. And what was that laughing for? Kihyun frowned.  
Yoongi followed his gaze and saw a muscular and handsome man was dragging his silver-hair man along to a chair near the window. They were laughing and talking. Yoongi turned his look into Kihyun who was still watching them in sad expression. Yes, it was a sad expression. Kihyun might deny it but Yoongi knew him and he knew it wasn't an usual angry or nonchalant face as he always tried to show to anybody. It was a forlorn look Kihyun had ever given to someone.  
"You know them?" Yoongi asked, spooning his ice cream cake and shoved it into his own mouth.  
Kihyun only looked at him. His face was tense and he shrugged. "Even if I know, I don't care."  
Yoongi kept spooning his ice cream cake. He was sure that it was the guy who Kihyun talked about and maybe dreamt about lately. Well maybe unconsciously. Kihyun talked about him in a very secretive and careful manner so Yoongi had to guess who the man was.  
Kihyun, tried his best to not glance over them, was defetaed by his curiosity. He kept glancing at them and gritted his teeth in anger.  
Yoongi patted his shoulder. " You need to clarify that. I knew he was the man you always talked about. Don't you dare lying to me, Kihyun."  
Kihyun frowned. He put his spoon away and stared outside the window.  
Yoongi reached out Kihyun's hands and held it in his own hands. He stared at Kihyun. He always loved those beautiful orbs of Kihyun who was fiery and intense. But now it was glossy and made him look beautifully fragile. Yoongi smiled. Yoo Kihyun was always beautiful. That little scar near his temple or his piercings never stole his beauty away.  
"Kihyunnie, it was him, wasn't it?"  
Kihyun turned his head to Yoongi. His cheeks blushed and hesitantly, he nodded. He glanced over to Hyunwoo again.  
***  
Hyunwoo saw Kihyun sat at the opposite direction of him in the cafe. Some blonde man who had same slender and small figure was holding Kihyun's hands in his hands.  
Hyunwoo, who was laughing, now stopped and his eyes met with Kihyun's eyes.  
Time seemed to freeze.  
Hyunwoo felt a sudden anxious and uncomfortable feeling in his chest and stomach. He felt an inexplicable anger rose up. He secretly hated when Kihyun's hands were held by someone else ...  
Or when he sat like a couple with someone else ...  
Or when he smiled to someone else ...  
He wanted that hands, smile and body of Yoo Kihyun to be his ...  
Hyunwoo bit his lips. He often saw Kihyun with that guy hung around. He believed that the guy was a bad influence to Kihyun as he could see that the guy wore same style of clothes just like Kihyun, black in black.  
And as the anger filled him up, he rose from his seat and walked towards Kihyun. Minhyuk was shocked and called him in confusion,"Hyung? Where you're going to?"  
Hyunwoo didn't care if he was called impulsive. He just walked to Kihyun, who was looking at him in disbelief. He grabbed Kihyun's hands by force, made the other guy who was sat in front of him flinched and glared at him. He pulled Kihyun up and sent a threat look to the guy, " I'm going with him."  
The guy wanted to say something but decided to shut his mouth as he saw no resistance from Kihyun's side. He just glared at him.  
Hyunwoo managed to drag Kihyun along to go outside. He didn't care when he heard Minhyuk called him in confusion. Or when Kihyun whispered sternly," Let me go, you embarrass me!"  
He kept dragging Kihyun along, breached through group of people who scurried to cross the green light.  
After a distance, he stopped. They were now standing under the lamp post in the city park. Kihyun yanked his hands away and looked at Hyunwoo in furious.  
"Stop doing this, hyung!" He furiously yelled at Hyunwoo.  
Hyunwoo kept quiet. Observing him.  
Irritated, Kihyun clenched his fist and without a warning, he swung his fist into Hyunwoo's face. He didn't know for sure why he did that but he was very angry with the guy in front of him. All this pain, unexplained feeling, bitterness and confusion filled every ounce of him and he snapped. Just like a fiery flame ...  
Hyunwoo, surprisingly, was only wiped his bleeding lips away in calm manner. He took a deep breath and faced Kihyun as if he asked Kihyun to continue to launch attack to him.  
Kihyun, out of frustration, swung another fist to Hyunwoo's face, followed by another fist, and after the third, he pulled Hyunwoo roughly and kissed him ...  
The kiss was rough and painful. Kihyun remembered again that day in the rooftop of third-level abandoned building near his campus where he kissed Hyunwoo for the first time.  
But this kiss was rough and painful in different level. Kihyun could taste the blood from Hyunwoo's lips. But he was focused only to taste the sweetness of Hyunwoo's lips that was devouring his lips as well.  
Kihyun gripped Hyunwoo's front jacket tightly as if he was afraid to let go and the action was replied by Hyunwoo's hand in the back of his head, impatiently pulled him closer to deepen their kiss.  
After minutes maybe hours, they lost track of time, they pulled out to catch their breath. As they were panting, Kihyun didn't dare to look into Hyunwoo's eyes. He stared at the ground with their forehead leaned to each other. Hyunwoo was breathing heavily in his face. Kihyun felt his legs faltered away and he tightened his grip on Hyunwoo to support his body.  
It was Hyunwoo who lightly held his chin and lifted his face. He stared into Kihyun's beautiful orbs that were glowing and glistening under the lamp post. Those eyes that were haunting him day and night, made him miserable but in a beautiful kind of way. Hyunwoo's heart felt like exploding from this overwhelmed feeling towards the man in front of him.  
This time Kihyun was staring into Hyunwoo's eyes. How he loved to look into those small eyes that reflected gentleness and strength of the owner. Kihyun closed his eyes, afraid of looking miserable. How he hated his fragile heart but he didn't know why, this time he trusted his heart, " What are we, hyung? What games are we playing now?"  
Hyunwoo stroked Kihyun's chestnut hair softly and shook his head, " We're not playing anything, Yoo Kihyun ... I'm tired of fooling myself, denying the only one I want so much .."  
Kihyun stared at him as his heart skipped a beat.  
"I don't want to run anymore. This time, I know I have fallen in love with you."  
Kihyun sometimes hated his heart, his paper heart. But this time, he believed his heart that was beating rapidly under the dim light of lamp post and it was beautiful...


	3. Paper Hearts (3)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Ending and The Epilogue of a strange and beautiful love story of a troubled guy and the perfect guy and the closure of the friendship/love of Yoongi and Kihyun

I live through pictures as if I was right there by your side  
But you'll be good without me  
and if I could just give it some time, I'll be alright  
Goodbye love you flew right by by love ...  
~~~~~ Paper Hearts ~~~~~

If Minhyuk could point one happiest time in his life, was when he was around Son Hyunwoo. Seeing him from a close distance, laughing with him, eating with him, or studying together. He could have never thought something better to replace this feeling. How he loved the gentleness of the this large man that occupied his mind since the beginning and his humble heart that didn't fit in his popularity. Minhyuk knew he was fooling himself that there would never a chance for him to get Hyunwoo's heart. He knew this man liked girls and he wasn't. Although it was such a harsh reality, he accepted it and was content to where he was now, being close to the man he fell in love with.  
These days, he felt Hyunwoo got further and further. He was always busy by himself. He excused himself after they had lunch together and disappeared. Minhyuk wasn't as innocent as what people might think. He knew someone had preoccupied Hyunwoo's mind and heart lately. It was clearly seen by Hyunwoo's beaming face, energetic spirit, and how he could just blank out with a sweet smile in the corner of his lips. Minhyuk was curious but his heart asked himself to stop asking because he might find out that it would hurt him to know the answer.  
Minhyuk sometimes hated his weak heart ... his paper heart .. It's weakened by Hyunwoo day by day since the day they met. Hyunwoo might never knew that he was one of the best thing in life for Minhyuk ...

*** 

They both sat in silence whilst everyone walking and holding hands.  
Yeouido Han river park in the afternoon was not a secluded place, it was such a romantic place to date thanks to Korean dramas that publicly attracted many people to have dates there, indulging their romantic imagination ...  
The water created a small waves blown by autumn wind where the trees almost lost all their leaves creating a dull and barren view although some grass still left its greenish color yet tainted with yellowish and brownish streak.  
Hyunwoo took a deep breath caused someone beside him flinched a bit. They were waiting for moment where one of them made the first move to avoid this awkward silence.  
Hyunwoo chuckled. He sipped his warm Americano and put it next to him. His hand brushed to another hand accidentally. It was a small and light touch but felt like a thousand voltage electricity wave for both of them. Hearts beat faster and a beautiful blush ...  
Kihyun, who sat next to this large man, wearing his usual black T-shirt but he layered it with his light blue hoodie. Ripped jeans is always his favorite and he applied a bit eyeliner to sharpen his eye line, turned his head to his right. His eyes met those warm brown eyes belonged to Hyunwoo.  
"I .. don't .. you know, it's really awkward to me ..," Kihyun was losing his words, he tried to think how to put his thought into words now, when Hyunwoo teased him lightly, " You're awkward with me? After all those kisses?"  
"It's not ... what? Wh--no! I .. ah," Kihyun really looked losing his words at all, retreating to say any word. He fidgeted a bit, feeling uncertain.  
Hyunwoo who was watching his reaction, quickly reached out his hands and squished it gently with his hands. He never knew he could be .. touchy like this. He wasn't this type of man, at least what he believed. But now, he felt abundant loving feeling towards this delicate man who sat beside him, wanting to him to be comfortable, and showing him that he was special ... for Hyunwoo.  
Kihyun looked him in the eyes and Hyunwoo was sure Kihyun was blushing, feeling Hyunwoo's hands holding his hands gently.  
"I know what you mean, Kihyun. It's my first time too. Dating with ... guy .." Hyunwoo is blushing now. He hid it by clearing his throat and pretended to be cool.  
Kihyun nodded. He wasn't sure what to say. He just simply replied, " It's .. me too ...I mean, it's my first time ... dating .."  
"Oh, first time dating a .. guy too?" Hyunwoo asked curiously.  
Kihyun gulped. " Both. First time to go on dating and first time dating a guy."  
Hyunwoo widened his eyes in disbelief but seeing Kihyun's face was serious, he stopped himself for commenting. He then looked at their hands that were holding each other. What he did maybe too cheesy but he slowly interlocked them together and smiled, "They fit together." Then showing their interlocked hands to Kihyun.  
Kihyun never knew that dating would be this lovely. What he thought and knew was incredibly wrong and how he loved to be wrong about it now ....

***

No matter how close Yoongi and Kihyun was as friends, Hyunwoo never liked the man. He had his concern towards Kihyun, he was afraid that Yoongi brought more negative impact to Kihyun's life or decisions.  
Hyunwoo squinted his eyes, disturbed as he saw Yoongi talked too close with Kihyun, showed a paper and laughed together. Today Kihyun asked him to come to a cafe where Yoongi would perform. He hesitated at first but seeing Kihyun's sad eyes, he changed his mind. He didn't like seeing Kihyun in pain or hurt. He just wanted Kihyun to be happy with him, although he must swallow his jealousy inside and burry it. After he finished all his paper works, he walked through the city to spesific cafe that Kihyun had directed him through phone.  
Kihyun looked beautiful as usual. Today he applied some make up on his eyes with eyeliner framed his little almond eyes, some lip tint on his lips with a styled hair and simple black choker around his smooth milky neck. Hyunwoo had to clear his mind everytime he glanced over that neck ...  
Kihyun, as if he could sense Hyunwoo's aura, turned his head and a sweet smile spread in his lips. He motioned Hyunwoo to come closer to where he was sitting with Yoongi. Hyunwoo walked to them and let a thin smile formed in his lips because Yoongi was also staring at him in observing manner. They never talked and the only common between them was Kihyun.  
Kihyun soon realized how awkward the situation and began to talk. He tried so hard to melt this icy situation. Somehow, Hyunwoo paid attention to what he did and made himself relaxed. Now Yoongi's turn to perform. He was a good rapper. But tonight, he brought along his guitar and said to audience in full confidence, "Tonight, not only I would rap, but I would also try to present my own new composed song. I hope you enjoy this." Without much more talking, Yoongi started to play his guitar and a sweet melody started to fill the cafe. Singing about adoration, strength and being found in an embrace of a person.  
Hyunwoo glanced to Kihyun who was enjoying Yoongi's performance in full concentration. He felt a bit of jealousy seeing the admiration look in Kihyun's eyes as he swallowed every words came from Yoongi's lips. Hyunwoo frowned. This wasn't supposed to be a date at all. He wanted that admiration only to himself.  
As if Kihyun understood being watched by Hyunwoo, he held Hyunwoo's hands under the table and interlocked them. Hyunwoo looked at Kihyun who was now looking at him in sweet expression. He would be lying if he said that he didn't totally fell in love now with the owner of that face. Hyunwoo gave him back his smile. In times like this, he felt like the universe was made only for both of them..

*** 

Kihyun noticed how pale Yoongi was. His pale skin added that fact. He looked overly tired and slept most of the time. They didn't hang out often now as Hyunwoo always gave that disapprove expression whenever he mentioned Yoongi's name. Kihyun knew Hyunwoo was overly concerned or maybe jealous over Yoongi but Kihyun always tried to convince him that Yoongi was a dearest friend to him and there was no way he would keep his distance away from Yoongi. Sometimes when he got tired explaining and Hyunwoo kept on pestering about it, they would end up in harsh argument and there would be days went by without contacting each other. But somehow, Hyunwoo always ended up being in front of his apartment door and without a word holding him like there's no tomorrow. After that, they would be fine again.  
He was worried of Yoongi. Kihyun could feel that his best friend was keeping something from him and he was furious that he didn't bother to let Kihyun knew about that. He was afraid that Yoongi might being in a bad situation and didn't want him to know. He could ask over and over but Yoongi jokingly said that he looked like a nagging wife and reassured Kihyun that he was fine.  
One day Yoongi passed out while he was sleeping and Kihyun thought he was so tired so he left him in his apartment. He just noticed that day by day, Yoongi also lost his appetite.  
"You, what happened? Something bad happened? Tell me, you brat." Kihyun would harshly asked in a joking way just to make Yoongi spilled his secret.  
Yoongi only shook his head and laughed. He never answered.

***

"You should stop visiting his apartment, Kihyun. What should I do if my boyfriend always spent the night in another man's house?" Hyunwoo said in impatient tone. He and Kihyun were having lunch in Hyunwoo's kitchen. Hyunwoo was living by himself in a medium apartment that was purchased by his own money. He was a wealthy man but worked by himself to support himself instead of living by his parents' wealth.  
Kihyun stopped what he was doing and looking at Hyunwoo in disbelief. "Hyung .." He looked tired.  
"Kihyun, I'm serious. I couldn't see you together with him. I don't know why." Hyunwoo said, now with serious tone. He stared deeply into Kihyun's eyes.  
"Don't start this." Kihyun gritted his teeth and suddenly his appetite had gone. He rose up and walked to sink. He threw the remaining food into trash can and put the dish into sink.  
"Yoo Kihyun, I'm asking you, just ... don't be too close with him .." Hyunwoo reached to Kihyun's waist and kept looking into younger's eyes.  
"How can I, hyung? You know how close we are. I'm tired explaining this over and over to you!" Kihyun rubbed his temple, feeling irritated.  
Hyunwoo was quiet for a while. He finally spoke, " Is it really a difficult request from me? Is worrying you such a burdensome? Knowing you always go home late at nights and need to wake up early in the morning has worried me so much. Do you still remember when you got sick after coming home late at night after taking care of your friend? But you had to come to campus to finish your deadline and exams? I almost put you into hospital because your fever was so high! What should I do if you were me? Tell me."  
Kihyun's face was dark. He hated being confronted when he was feeling uncertain about this situation. He knew he just did what every people did towards their friend especially when he felt something wrong happened lately to his bestfriend. At the same time he knew Hyunwoo was feeling worried about him. He felt lately his energy was drained due to his work and assignment and Yoongi. Usually he only replied back with a shrug but this time he snapped, "Hyung! Don't force me! Yoongi is my friend and if you care about me, you shouldn't have asked me to choose something like this! Have I ever asked you to not hang around with Minhyuk? Your so-called-friend when everyone knew how much he loved you? I didn't do that, did I? It's because I do respect your life! What won't you do the same with mine?"  
Hyunwoo was taken aback. He asked in disbelief, " How--what do you mean? Minhyuk ... loved me?"  
Kihyun took a deep breath. He wriggled off himself from Hyunwoo's hands and walked away. Hyunwoo called him, "Kihyun?"  
Kihyun was looking at him and said in flat tone, "You heard me, hyung. I didn't know how you could be so blind not to see what everyone see. That boy has a crush on you. You can ask him if you want to know the truth."  
Kihyun went and left Hyunwoo in deep confusion.

***

It was a torment weeks as Hyunwoo didn't see Kihyun around. He spent his times more often with Yoongi and made Hyunwoo angry. They separated without official words. But Hyunwoo never stopped loving him anyway. Everytime he tried to talk to Kihyun, the latter only avoided him. Hyunwoo was patient enough to let Kihyun's anger faded. He waited and waited. His heart was beaten day by day with every rising sun that reminded him that Kihyun's smile was disappearing from his life ...

Kihyun felt like running and running. His heart was hurted. He stopped himself from running and looked up to the sky that was raining hard.  
Yoo Kihyun was watching in agony when his crush stood there, holding an umbrella, together with another person. Smiling and laughing under the rain. He was drenched from head to toe but his heart was drier than Sahara desert. He bowed his head down to smile bitterly. He gripped his front jacket as if he wanted to keep his heart intact and protected it while it was beating. He didn't know why he felt jealous. He always knew that Minhyuk liked Hyunwoo. He saw Minhyuk confessed when Hyunwoo confronted him to confirm Kihyun's statement when they had fight. It was accidental and Kihyun didn't mean to peep over their talk but he coudn't help it. He saw how Hyunwoo was shocked but then he just held Minhyuk who was apologizing and sobbing in his embrace. Kihyun felt his heart was shattered and ran. He avoided Hyunwoo ever since.  
Not so long after Minhyuk's confession, he saw them still walking together like there was nothing happened. They laughing and walking while holding an umbrella. Sharing it under the heavy rain in front of crossroad where Kihyun stood.  
Was he too reckless let Hyunwoo choose between him and Minhyuk when he said that Minhyuk had a crush on him? Or was he too reckless when he said he would still be with Yoongi even if Hyunwoo didn't like it? Was he wrong? How did Hyunwoo get over him so easily when Kihyun was wrecked under these grey skies that filled with water pouring into the ground .. mixed with his own tears that rolled down as he tried to empty his heart away ....  
***  
Yoongi was waiting for Kihyun impatiently. He chuckled when he saw Kihyun walked towards him with a disturbed expression as he got closer.  
"What is it? Your non-stop phone call really got me into trouble in the class, you prick!" Kihyun grumbled as he sat down in front of Yoongi.  
Yoongi, without many word, handed him a passport.  
Kihyun widened his eyes. "What is this?"  
"Your passport, Yoo Kihyun." Yoongi grinned.  
"Passport? When--oh that time when you dragged my ass to immigration office?"  
Yoongi nodded. He gulped down his latte.  
Kihyun took the passport and checked it. "England? Why is it written that--" Kihyun's sentence was hung as he looked Yoongi who was grinning widely now.  
"Yoo Kihyun , let's fly to England ..."  
***  
Kihyun was holding the passport in his hands. His mind replayed over and over that day. Everything that happened. Yoongi's face and Hyunwo's face. Minhyuk's face.  
Hyunwoo was right. Yoongi had feeling over Kihyun and it was said in a very casual manner as expected from Yoongi.  
That day, after Yoongi gave him the passport, they were walking together to Kihyun's place. It was a peaceful silence when Yoongi suddenly said, "Kihyunnie."  
"Hmm?" Kihyun hummed, still walking.  
He didn't know that Yoongi had already stopped and being left behind. When he realized, there was a quite distance between them. He looked at Yoongi in quizzical expression.  
"What are you doing?" Kihyun asked and walked back to Yoongi.  
Yoongi was looking at him intently and in a unreadable expression. He inched towards Kihyun who was standing in front of him now.  
"Hey .." Kihyun warned him as Yoongi got closer and closer.  
Yoongi didn't say a word. but he reached both of Kihyun's hands and and said, " Kihyun, fly with me to England so we will always stay like this."  
Kihyun chuckled a bit because of his friend's odd behavior. "Haven't I always been with you? I don't even have my own life because I'm busy taking care of you."  
Yoongi's expression was still serious. And the words he said after made Kihyun's heart jolted in place.  
"No. Not as friend anymore ... I want you as my lover .. "  
Kihyun surely had a sleepless night after the confession while he was holding the passport. Yoongi asked him to leave everything behind and started a new with him in England ...  
Leaving Korea ... leaving Hyunwoo behind ...

***  
Yoongi was waiting impatiently in the airport. He glanced to the crowds, hoping to see someone he was waiting for. Minutes by minutes and one hour had passed. Yoongi glanced over the airport clock and nervously tapped his feet. Maybe he didn't want to go after all, he thought to himself.  
It was one week ago he bravely confessed his feeling to Kihyun and asked him to leave Korea. A little bit reckless and Yoongi knew it but he had to take that chance because he knew he only had a little time. He never knew what Kihyun felt about him. He knew that Kihyun had separated with Hyunwoo for two months although he still saw that lingering look whenever Kihyun saw Hyunwoo from afar. Yoongi noticed how Kihyun still kept Hyunwoo's things in his apartment.  
Yoongi knew and he didn't care. His patience had run out ...  
He was disappointed when Kihyun didn't show up. He looked up to the sky from a window pane, watching as planes went down and off to the sky.  
He felt someone tapped his shoulder and in front of him was Kihyun who was panting heavily. " I made it on time .."  
Yoongi smiled the biggest smile he had ever had ... 

***  
Hyunwoo was unable to concentrate at all. He didn't know if Kihyun had already moved on or not. Because he hadn't. He needed to hear it from Kihyun. He needed to know if he was the only one who felt that or not. Maybe it was only an excuse because he really missed Kihyun. He missed Kihyun's scent, he missed Kihyun's lips and eyes and everything about him.  
Hyunwoo might have fallen in love too deeply with Kihyun and he wasn't ashamed of it. Even he had to crawl in front of him, he would do it.  
Sometimes Hyunwoo hated his weak heart, his paper heart ... and Kihyun knew how to crumbled it ...  
Hyunwoo drove his car in medium speed. After parked his car, he walked in quick pace to Yoongi's apartment. His best guess was that Kihyun was here. So he went straight to Yoongi's apartment. He knew this place from Minhyuk who was Yoongi's classmate in literature. 

Minhyuk, suddenly Hyunwoo thought about Minhyuk.  
He was a really great friend along. Hyunwoo recalled the day when he asked what Kihyun told him about Minhyuk's feeling towards him and he confessed his feeling. Hyunwoo was shocked at first but then he gently held Minhyuk in his embrace to comfort him who was sobbing, feeeling ashamed by his own confession. Hyunwoo remembered saying, " Don't worry and don't be ashamed. I'm thankful of your feeling but I can't accept your feeling, Minhyukkie. There is someone else that I truly love. I hope we're still together like usual, as a good friend because I can't see you being hurtful, Minhyukkie."  
Minhyuk slowly accpeted the fact and they were still good friends after all. That's when he remembered about Kihyun and Yoongi. He felt guilty to ever asked Kihyun to leave his friend who liked him secretly. Hyunwoo understood now what Kihyun felt and suddenly all those arguments and fights semed to be so childish and irrelevant.  
How he wanted to hug Kihyun and kissed him endlessly and said sorry for what he did.  
Hyunwoo stopped his step and looked the door in front of him. Seemed so silent and there was no sound coming from inside. He hesitantly pressed the bell but no one opened it. After 10 minutes waiting, he got tired and started to crouch down, still determined to wait for Kihyun.  
Someone was walking past to him and paid attention. " Who are you?" he asked. He looked young and maybe same age like Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo smiled. " Ah, I am waiting for my friend who lived here .. maybe he's out so I'm just waiting here until he returns."  
The man scrunched his forehead in confusion. " Yoongi? Well, he had moved out of this apartment..."  
Hyunwoo was confused. " Moved out? When?"  
"This morning. He sent his belongings to some friends and even to me. He was moving abroad with his boyfriend .. I guess." The neighbor explained.  
Hyunwoo felt his heart skipped a beat. "B--boyfriend? Which one? I mean .. how does he look?"  
The neighbor watched Hyunwoo's face intently. "Who are you anyway? If you're Yoongi's friend, you should've known that Yoongi is going to move, right?"  
Hyunwoo felt his face reddened. He cleared his throat. " I am not really his friend. Actually, my--friend is Yoongi's friend and I'm hoping to see my friend here.."  
The neighbor nodded. "Oh, I see. I don't know about his boyfriend. I always see him around here. His height is about Yoongi's height, thin, and um, quite pretty for a male. Well, maybe you can find them at the airport now. As far as I know, Yoongi mentioned about 3 pm flight somewhere abroad .. um, France ..uh no, England. Yes, Yoongi said it was England."  
Hyunwoo could feel his blood was rushed out. He felt panic inside. It's Kihyun ... and he was leaving ...  
Hyunwoo bowed and said thank you and went quickly. He drove his car to airport in rush. It was 2 pm and the traffic looked like a mess. Or maybe because Hyunwoo was not interested to drive slowly.  
"Kihyun ... don't leave ... please .." He muttered to himself in distress.  
There was nothing dreadful than knowing that you're about to lose everything in a second .. and Kihyun was his everything ...

***

 

~ EPILOGUE ~ 

Kihyun lifted his small hand and smiled. The sun was shining warmly, radiating warm sensation in every part of his exposed skin. He took a deep breath to feel the fresh air came into his lungs. The trees were still green and some alread turned into yellow and crimson on early autumn. He enjoyed the view and peacefulness like this so much. After inhaling fresh air, he was looking at a fresh peony bouquet in his hands. He inhaled the peony bouquet and squatted in front of a grave. 

Min Yoongi  
Beloved son of Min Yuri and Kang Jisoo  
Born 1993 - Died 2016 

 

Kihyun put the flower in the grave and inhaled deeply. It's been 5 years since Yoongi's death. It was a bad year for Kihyun as he was lost in sadness in Yoongi's death. He remembered clearly that day in the airport. 

Yoongi smiled at him with a biggest smile that Kihyun didn't know he had. He was beaming. "Kihyunnie .. you come .."  
Kihyun smiled but his heart was sad. He knew what Yoongi was meant behind those words. But Kihyun wanted to tell something differently.  
"Yoongi ..., " Kihyun paused. It was too hard to say seeing how happy Yoongi was, " I'm .. really sorry .." Kihyun couldn't finish his words when saw Yoongi's expression.  
Yoongi looked so sad and desperate. But he inhaled deeply and held Kihyun's face soflty. He gave his best smile, " I understand, Kihyun. I really do ... I .. hope you'll always be happy ... with Hyunwoo or anybody else .."  
Kihyun felt his eyes watery. He stuttered, " We're still friends, Yoongi?"  
Yoongi flicked his forehead. " We do, you fool." Yoongi laughed seeing Kihyun rubbed his forehead. They looked at each other and Kihyun pulled Yoongi into his embrace. They were embracing each other tightly with inexplicable feeling seeping out of every inch of their body cells. There was a sad silence as they bid farewell to each other.  
Yoongi broke their hug and started walking away. Before he disappeared in the entrance of plane, he turned his body and said, " I do really hope you'll always be happy Kihyunnie! If he ever hurted you, don't hesitate to come to England and find me." Then he smiled and waved his hands. " See you again, my friend." He whispered softly, drank every minutes and memories he had with Kihyun, while waving his last farewell to his best friend ...  
***  
Kihyun felt a strong pair of hands held his shoulders. He turned and saw a concerned look in his husband's eyes. He wiped his tears and cooed a baby in his husband's arms. He took the baby and craddled her soflty while kissing her in motherly way.  
Hyunwoo was watching Kihyun fondly. He stroke Kihyun's cheeks lightly. " Are you okay?"  
Kihyun, who was giving small kiss in his baby girl's lips, smiled and said, " Yes. I am."  
Hyunwoo then put his arms in Kihyun's shoulder and they started to walk away from the Yoongi's grave. Hyunwoo remembered clearly that day in the airport.

Hyunwoo was running with all his might inside the airport. His mind was preoccupied with Kihyun's leaving him. He breached through the crowds, mumbling sorry in his way as he crashed every one in his way. He panted heavily when he arrived in the boarding section. Craned his neck to look for the familiar figure he missed the most. Hyunwoo cursed as he saw the announcement in the announcement board that the plane from Seoul had taken off to England 5 minutes ago.  
F******g 5 minutes late! He slumped in the airport bench and closed his face with both of his hands in desperation. He thought he was too strong to cry but here, he cried softly for his foolishness. His Kihyun had left him and brought his heart along to England ...  
"Hyunwoo hyung?" A doubtful voice called his name.  
Hyunwoo lifted his face and he almost had heart attack as he saw Kihyun was standing in front of him with quzzical expression.  
"Kihyun.." Hyunwoo mumbled softly and jumped to embrace him.  
Kihyun was startled but he put his hands in Hyunwoo's back and stroke it gently. " Hyung .."  
Hyunwoo sobbed in Kihyun's arms. It was a short sob as he pulled himself out and looked into Kihyun," Listen to me now. I hate those moments when we fought. I hated it when I had to be away from you. I hated it when I found out how empty my life without you. I hated how weak I am when you came in my life but you -- you made it worth while. Yoo Kihyun, I love you with all I am. Don't ever leave me again. Forgive me for what I've done. Punish me as you want but don't leave me alone ..."  
Kihyun understood. He looked inside those brown eyes of Hyunwoo and whispered, " I will never leave you. I am here for you."  
He knew how weak his heart was, his paper heart. With one word, he had been won over. But those arguments and fights seemed to be so childish and irrelevant ...  
***  
They walked in silence. Their hands still intertwined to each other while Kihyun's other hand held their 3 months baby girl.  
The baby was a blessing when they had their relationship stable and moved together. They held a sacred wedding in closed ceremony with limited guess and family. Hyunwoo and Kihyun planned to adopt when a friend suggested them to have a surrogate mother to carry their child. The cost was high but the baby would be their own flesh and blood. Hyunwoo' parents were gladly accepted the idea and Kihyun asked Hyunwoo to be father of their first baby.  
Son Hyun-joo was born and reunited Kihyun with his family. Hyunwoo's parents more than welcome to open their hearts to Kihyun and the baby. Kihyun's heart was slowly healed from his past, the rejection and Yoongi's death as he held the little hand of his newborn Hyun-joo in the hospital.  
Kihyun turned his body to look at Yoongi's grave. Hyunwoo followed his gaze. He didn't say anything.  
"He said to me that he hoped that I would always be happy when we said our last goodbye in that airport, hyung. His last wish comes true. It does." Kihyun fondly smiling to Hyunwoo who was smiling too after hearing that. He pulled Kihyun closer and kissed Kihyun's forehead sweetly.  
"I will do with all I am to make you both happy, Kihyun-ah, Hyunjoo-ya." Hyunwoo then kissed his daughter's head in Kihyun's arms. Hyun-joo cooed.  
They looked at each other lovingly and walked to their car.  
"Bye Yoongi ... I hope you do well up there .." Kihyun whispered silently to the sky above as the car slowly went away and the leaving the graveyard which was covered in falling yellow and crimson leaves. 

***  
Flashback :  
Yoongi sat down in his seat. His heart was broken. He knew it was going to end like this. But as a good friend he is, he knew that Hyunwoo could make Kihyun happy. That thought brought a smile in his lips although his head was excruciatingly painful. He winced as the pain kept increasing, made it harder to breathe. He shuffled in his seat while holding his head.  
He remembered that night as the memory of his childhood replayed in his mind. It was a beautiful days of his life when his mother and father were still together. But that night, Yoongi was looking at the pictures of his MRI scan result in his phone that were sent by his doctor.  
Kihyun might never know but he had been diagnosed with last stadium of brain cancer by his doctor that he secretly visited. That's when his adventure of life started. Yoongi wanted to live his life fully without any limitation or pain or border. He was really regretful to drag along Kihyun to his adventure as he saw Kihyun enjoyed it so much. He knew that what Kihyun needed was actually someone stronger to heal his heart, not someone as weak as Yoongi that could only runaway to spend his limited time on earth.  
He remembered everything. Of his father, of his mother, of Kihyun ... he couldn't properly said goodbye to them ...  
Yoongi looked to his window. He was in VVIP class so no one bothered him. He winced as the pain kept pounding in his head. He drew a heart shape in the window as if he wrote it in the clouds and breathed out the window glass to make the heart visible. He smiled. 

Yoo Kihyun, I live through pictures as if I was right there by your side  
But you'll be good without me  
and if I could just give it some time, I'll be alright  
Goodbye love ...

With the last lyric in his mind, Yoongi closed his eyes ... his pain finally ended ..

~~~~ THE END ~~~


End file.
